Pizza’s not ready

The kids have a little robot thing that they got for Christmas last year. It rolls around and waves its arms and shoots little disk things and blinks its lights — and speaks in this very thick Japanese accent in the worst Engrish I’ve ever heard. It’s hilarious. Some of the more amusing phrases:

  • Ready? Shit. (It’s actually “shoot” but with the accent, that’s what it sounds like)
  • Let’s dance together! Is lovely!
  • I teach you how to dance
  • Uh-oh. Pieces not ready. (though I always hear “pizza’s not ready”)

It also says a bunch of other things that I cannot understand. Whenever I read or hear these kinds of things, I always remind myself that as broken as it is, their English is still better than my Japanese or Chinese, so I shouldn’t laugh. But I do.


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