Let me tell you about my kids


The other day, Ryan wrote himself a couple of todo lists and posted them on the kitchen window. He wrote the whole thing himself without asking how to spell anything. This is exactly how he wrote it:

I have to bo this in the mornen

  • breakfast
  • get drest
  • teeth
  • hair
  • then you can play

I have to do this in the evnen

  • homework
  • eat dinner
  • then you can play
  • have storys
  • go to bed

Some other little things about my kids that I don’t want to forget as they get older:

  • When Ryan was just learning to speak, he said his own name “yaya”. When Nicholas was learning to speak, he called himself “nick-is” and pronounced Ryan “I-yan”.
  • When Ryan was about 2, we got a babysitter for him so that Gail and I could go out. The girl next door, Lindsay, arrived as Ryan was finishing his dinner. She sat down beside him and said hi. He stopped eating, looked at her for a few seconds, and then told her matter-of-factly “You don’t have a penis”. Without blinking an eye, she confirmed his suspicions, and he continued with his dinner, apparently satisfied.
  • When both the boys were babies, they would sit in their high chair with their legs crossed.
  • When Gail was pregnant with Nicholas, we narrowed the list of boys names down to two – Eric and Nicholas. We asked Ryan to make the final decision, and he chose Nicholas. We picked Sean as a middle name just because we liked it. The girls name we had chosen (before Ryan was born) was Amy Catherine.
  • When we first brought Nicholas home from the hospital, Ryan kept forgetting his name, and called him “that guy” for a day or two.
  • The word that took the longest to say correctly was “garbage”. Ryan always said “gar-jib”, and when Nicholas was learning to talk, he learned to say “gar-jib” too. Ryan started saying it correctly just a few weeks later, but Nicholas kept saying it incorrectly for another year and a half.

Wil Wheaton Dot Net


Wil Wheaton* has one of the most widely-read blogs on the ‘net. I’ve been reading it for about a year and a half – I started reading it because I’m a huge Star Trek: The Next Generation fan, and of course Wil played Wesley Crusher on that show for 5 years. After a while, however, I came to realize that he’s a damn good writer, and now I read his blog because I enjoy what he writes, and the Star Trek angle is secondary, especially since he doesn’t write about Star Trek all that often.

* – Wil’s site was wilwheaton.net, but he started having problems with that site last fall, and so he temporarily moved his blog over to Typepad. Six months later, he’s still on Typepad, but I think he plans on fixing up his own site and re-launching it sometime soon.

Recently he started podcasting – basically recording himself talking rather than just typing stuff, and then releasing the recording as episodes of “Radio Free Burrito”. People started sending him questions that he would answer on his podcasts, and I sent him one asking about his least favourite episodes of ST:TNG. Today, he answered my question – a couple of episodes during the first season called Angel One and Code of Honor, which were, indeed, quite bad. He also mentioned a particular conversation that Wesley had with Tasha Yar talking about drugs, and how embarassing the lines were to say. Wesley asked Tasha why people did drugs, and Tasha told him it made them feel good. Wesley said that it was artificial, Tasha says that it doesn’t feel artificial at the time, and Wesley says he still doesn’t understand, to which Tasha replies “Wesley, I hope you never do”. I wondered how Wil felt about that conversation – it was a very thinly-disguised attempt at a public service announcement. Luckily, they stopped short of having the characters turn directly to the camera and say “Kids! Don’t do drugs! And stay in school!”, but it wasn’t far short.

Anyway, it was cool to have some famous person say my name (and not even mispronounce it!). Last year, I got on the radio, and now this. My big break is coming soon, I just know it…

I’m a star!


Thanks to my work on attempting to get CC certification for ASA, I was given an “iAnywhere Solutions Star Performer” award yesterday. I got a plastic star “trophy” thing (which actually looks cooler than it sounds), as well as a nice monetary bonus. Once we get this certification (should be later this month), it will allow us to sell ASA to various sectors within the US government, which requires this level of certification before they are allowed to purchase any software product. John yesterday congratulated me on my award and called me “a god among men”, which I think might be a bit of a stretch, but it is certainly nice to have my efforts recognized.

On an unrelated note, the sports headlines yesterday read “Barry Bonds Steroid Shocker”. Two guys in the know wrote a book stating that Barry Bonds used lots of steroids over the last few years. Question: “shocker”? Is anyone actually shocked?

Update: Fixed the CC link. Thanks Daniel!

Time to gut the Leafs


We need to blow up the Leafs. Now and again, every team has to go through the pain of “rebuilding”, and I think it’s the Leafs’ time. A friend of mine said recently that the worst thing that could happen to the Leafs this season is to make the playoffs, and I agree. It might give management the false belief that the team is just fine as it is, and just needs a bit of tweaking – it doesn’t. It needs a complete overhaul. The economics of the NHL has changed dramatically, and the Leafs old style of throwing money at over-the-hill veterans (and in some cases trading away draft picks and prospects to get them) simply will not work anymore. Look at Brian Leetch, Joe Nieuwendyk, Gary Roberts, Eric Lindros, Shane Corson, Ron Francis, even Ed Belfour. All veterans past their prime when they were acquired, and except for Roberts and (to some extent) Belfour, none really contributed much of anything.

I say we buy Belfour out and let him go, get rid of fan-favourite Tie Domi, who is a hard worker but is vastly overpaid, and get rid of Allison, O’Neill, Lindros, Czerkawski (who never plays anyway), Belak, Berg, and Antropov. We’ve already signed Kaberle (that’s good), and if we can afford to sign McCabe do it, otherwise trade him now while his trade value is high. I’m not even averse to trading Sundin if we can get some good prospects in return. Start over with a core of Colaiacovo, Ponikarovsky, Stajan, Steen, Tellqvist, and Wellwood, and keep Darcy Tucker (who’s playing really well this year), Sundin if not traded, and maybe Ken Klee cause we’ll need some veterans. Yes, the team will suck for four or five years, but if we get some good prospects and early draft picks in return for the old guys listed above, the Leafs might win a Cup before my kids hit university. If they keep trying to use the old Leafs style, my grandkids will be blogging about “no Leafs Cup wins in 75 years”.

Update: Oh yeah, and fire Pat Quinn.

Who does that?


I saw the weirdest thing this morning. I was looking out of my office window (3rd floor, facing the parking lot), while talking to Gail on the phone. I saw a black car drive in and park in the far corner of the parking lot. The driver got out of the car, went around to the other side (so the car was between him and the building), and peed into the snowbank. Then he got back in his car and drove off. I immediately called reception, though we don’t have any security people here, and by the time I called, he was already driving away, so it’s not like they could have done anything anyway. I’m not entirely sure why I called reception – I felt like it was my civic duty to tell someone, as if I had witnessed a robbery or something. I sent an email to the people in my department with offices facing the parking lot, but I’m sure this was an isolated incident – it’s not like the guy’s thinking “Hey, it’s Thursday! Better run over to iAnywhere and pee in the parking lot!”

He didn’t even wash his hands! Eeeewwwwwwwwww….

Attempting to be the squeaky wheel


I mentioned in a previous post that I wrote a letter (email, actually) to Brad Watters, the President of the Toronto Rock, regarding the announcers at the skills competition last Friday, and I got a response today. Here’s my original letter, and his reply:

Hi Mr. Watters… this is my sixth year as a Rock season ticket holder – in that time I’ve missed only one home game. For most of that time, we’ve had to put up with Two for the Show as the “hosts”. They were OK musicians, but as announcers, they’re simply annoying. But they only show up on the Jumbotron or PA now and again, so I can put up with that.

However, at the skills competition tonight, they were an embarrassment to this city, the Rock organization, and the NLL. These guys treated the skills competition, which featured the best lacrosse players in the world, like it was the Pizza Pizza relay or scooter race or something. Kaleb Toth has been a star in the NLL for years – he even played for the Rock – and they didn’t pronounce his name properly. Tracey Kelusky has also been an NLL star for several years, and one of the guys had to check the sheet to see what team he played for. It was painfully obvious that these guys do not follow the game, and other than Steve Toll, had no idea who any of these people were.

I think it would have been far better if Bruce Barker was brought down from the broadcast booth at halftime to call the skills competition from the floor. There’s a guy who knows a thing or two about announcing, and even more importantly, he follows the game. He knows who the players are, he knows what teams they play for, he knows what teams they used to play for — hell, he could probably tell you what teams half of them play for in the summer leagues.

I have been looking forward to the All-Star Game all season – I just hope that these two guys don’t make a mockery of it like they did the skills competition tonight. These guys have always given me the impression that they are out there because they are paid to be out there, but don’t give a crap about lacrosse. Please do us all a favour and get rid of them.

Graeme Perrow
graeme@perrow.ca

P.S. In case it wasn’t obvious from my comments above, I also wanted to say how happy I am that Bruce Barker is back in the booth for the Rock. Good job in getting him back.

Here’s Mr. Watters’ response:

Thanks for your feedback. It was a confusing and complicated game for us to run. I would let you know that Bruce Barker wasnt available to do it.

All the best

Brad Watters

Pretty lame-ass reply, if you ask me.

Coincidences


The Dilbert Blog today contained an article on coincidences, and numerous people have written in comments containins some pretty amazing ones. I’ve got one too:

Gail and I got married in October of 1995, and honeymooned in Ocho Rios, Jamaica. One of the day trips we took was a bus trip from Ocho Rios to the Blue Mountains, approximately four hours away. Once there, we took a bus to the top of a mountain, then biked down. Halfway down the mountain, the tour stopped at a little place for lunch. Gail went to the washroom while I sat at a picnic table – another couple from the tour was already sitting there. When Gail came back, she and the woman already at the table recognized each other – they had gone to high school together in Woodstock. Not only that, but they were on their honeymoon too – they got married the same day that we did, and they were staying in Ocho Rios, in the resort right next to ours. So not only did we get married on the same day, but we chose adjacent resorts in Ocho Rios, and then chose the same bus tour on the same day, but after all that, we didn’t run into each other until I chose to share their table for lunch.

I love stuff like that.

All-Star Weekend


This was the All-Star weekend in the NLL. Friday night was the inaugural “Hall of Fame Game”, where 5 people were inducted into the newly-formed indoor lacrosse hall of fame, which is currently an entity but not a building. The inductees were Russ Cline and Chris Fritz, the founders of the league that eventually morphed into the NLL, the legendary players Paul and Gary Gait, and the late Les Bartley, who was coach and GM of the Rock for 4 of their 5 championships (and coached Buffalo to 3 championships as well). The induction ceremony (which I missed because of crappy traffic on the QEW) was followed by the Toronto-Philadelphia game, which the Rock won in their second straight home overtime thriller. Very streaky game – with the Rock up 3-1, Philly scored 5 in a row, then Toronto scored 6 in a row, then Philly scored another 5 in a row, then Toronto got 2 to tie it up, and then Aaron Wilson scored the winner a few minutes into OT. The Rock, after an 0-4 start, are now 5-4 and are no longer last in the East!

At halftime, they had the skills competition, which featured four players for each of three events. The accuracy competition had players shooting four balls on Rock backup goalie John Preece from maybe 30 feet out – Gavin Prout was the only one to score (twice), and won that one. Then they had the hardest shot competition, won by John Grant with a shot at 151 km/h, although at least half of the shots weren’t registered on the radar gun. The players were moving forwards at the time, so the gun kept picking up the players movement – the player would fire a bullet into the net, and the gun would register “8”. Then they’d fire another shot, and the gun would say “145”.

The third competition was for the most creative breakaway, which the players had a lot of fun with. Jonas Derks (the eventual winner) started off by throwing his stick into the air a couple of times, then scored. Mark Steenhuis just kind of spun his stick around, and was kind of boring. John Tavares attempted a shot over the net, off the back board, and then tried to score on the rebound, but he missed the net. John Grant tried a neat one – throw the stick in the air, take his jersey off, catch the stick and score, although he didn’t throw the stick high enough, and had to catch the stick on a bounce.

The skills competition was pretty cool, but it could have (and should have) been much better – the problem was the announcers. It was the same Two for the Show guys that have been the Rock announcers for a few years, but it was painfully obvious that they don’t follow lacrosse at all. They pronounced a couple of names wrong, they had to check their sheet to see what team some of them played for, and generally treated this event like the silly little events they normally run at halftime – the Pizza Pizza relay, the Mazda scooter competition, or whatever. These are the best fucking lacrosse players in the world – they deserve an announcer that actually cares about their sport, and has at least done some research. Bruce Barker, who fits that bill very well, was sitting upstairs during the halftime show – I think he should have been on the floor for this competition, and I actually wrote a letter to Brad Watters, President of the Toronto Rock, telling him this.

Then yesterday was the All-Star Game, won by the West, 14-13. I expected the East to dominate, but Anthony Cosmo and Dallas Eliuk both played very well in goal for the West. Only 2 penalties in the entire game (not unexpected), and a rather low intensity level (also not unexpected), but there were some pretty hard hits and scrambles for loose balls. There were also a few things you wouldn’t see in a regular game – Mark Steenhuis spun the stick around like in the trick shot competition from the previous day, but did an even better job during the game. Twice, a player from the east would get the ball, then toss his entire stick (with the ball) to another player who would shoot. I think the first time it was Tavares tossing to Doyle, and the second was Grant tossing to Tavares, but the plan didn’t work either time. It looked like the players were having fun, and we all enjoyed the game.

Spaghetti dinner


Gail’s spaghetti dinner and silent auction was held last night at Ryan’s school. I say “Gail’s” because she’s the chair of the school council that ran the event, and has thought about little else for a couple of weeks. It was kind of a one-woman show last year — Gail’s council co-chair, Paul, did all the stuff for the auction, and Gail pretty much did everything else. It wasn’t like that so much this year — the council divvied up the responsibilities a little more evenly, so Gail was kind of the fore-person and was in charge of communications, and Paul did the auction again, but other people were responsible for the catering, desserts, decorations, entertainment, raffles, and other stuff. They had about 440 tickets sold, and something like 160 items at the auction, and ended up raising between $8000 and $9000, all of which will go towards music programs and instruments and stuff for the school.

A rousing success, as was last year’s event, which allowed them to purchase a scoreboard for the gym. The scoreboard also has some advertising panels on it, so local businesses pay to have signs there, which brings in even more money going forward.

A good time was had by, well, most. They had comment cards available (which Gail collected), and I took a look at two of them this morning – one gave the event a 5/5, saying that the food was good and hot (which was a problem last year), and everything was great. The other one (obviously written by a student) gave a 1/5, and said that the waiter got their drink order wrong, took too long, tried to steal their bread, and some other negative comment I can’t remember. Oh well, you can’t please everyone. We all had fun, anyway. My sister came as well, and was very helpful in keeping me from throttling Nicholas, who decided numerous times that a crowded gymnasium with over 400 people in it (plus tables, chairs and lots of food and breakable auction items), was a good place to spin around, dance, swing your coat around and generally play. As I’ve said before, whoever invented the phrase “the terrible twos” didn’t have a three-year-old.

I bid on a few items — Raptors tickets, a nice pair of sunglasses, gift certificates for green fees at local golf courses, and one or two other things I don’t remember, but just ended up with 2 sets of green fees, so I’ll take my dad golfing in the spring. Ryan purchased the opportunity to be “secretary for a 1/2 day”, so he gets to sit in the office and talk on the PA, do morning announcements, stuff like that. He’ll love it.

The Race Card


The other day, Bryant Gumbel said this on his HBO sports show:

Finally, tonight, the Winter Games. Count me among those who don’t care about them and won’t watch them… Because they’re so trying, maybe over the next three weeks we should all try too. Like, try not to be incredulous when someone attempts to link these games to those of the ancient Greeks who never heard of skating or skiing. So try not to laugh when someone says these are the world’s greatest athletes, despite a paucity of blacks that makes the winter games look like a GOP convention… So if only to hasten the arrival of the day they’re done, when we can move on to March Madness — for God’s sake, let the games begin.

What a moron. He’s right – there are far less black athletes at the winter games than the summer games, but there’s a logical (and rather obvious) reason for that. These are winter events, primarily dominated by northern countries – the Nordic countries, Europe, Russia. Not a lot of black people there. It’s not a global conspiracy to keep black people out, so why play the race card here? And implying that the world’s greatest athletes must be black is just plain racist. I think it’s funny that he goes on to mention March Madness, a college basketball tournament in which at least 80% of the players are black. Has anyone complained about the lack of white players in that tournament?

I’m rather surprised that this hasn’t been a bigger thing in the media. If a white reporter had said that he doesn’t like the March Madness tournament (or the NBA, or the NFL) because of the lack of white players, it would be front page news across North America and he’d be fired on the spot. Yet, Gumbel makes a patently racist statement and insults every athlete participating in the Games, and not only doesn’t get much media coverage, but doesn’t get fired. Apparently the president of HBO was interviewed yesterday and defended Gumbel*. I don’t get it.

* – Sorry, I looked around for a link to this interview but couldn’t find one. Bob McCown mentioned this on Prime Time Sports yesterday.